Friday, 18 July 2014

Environment Minister

His Sustainableness The Viscount Twaklinton has recently been appointed as the eminent though not particularly prominent Environment Minister for Nilkawt and Planet Earth.  He can usually be found mulching his organic vegetable gardens, recycling grey water after his royal palace ablutions, munching on the products of the palace orchards, and quietly campaigning for the abolition of scientific ignorance amongst the politicians of Nilkawt and other nations, particularly Australia.

The viscount receives no public funds for his efforts.  Nor does he receive any funds from any inherited duchies, expensively maintained charities or wealthy associates.  The viscount holds no shares in any public listed companies or even privately operated ones.  He is not a beneficiary of any family trusts, charitable trusts or mining royalties.

His Sustainableness has been responsible for the strictly enforced banning of all internal combustion engines within Nilkawtian territories, counties and communities.  He has also encouraged the widespread growing of beans, peas, lentils and cabbages in Nilkawt, leading to the global renown the nation receives for its industrial-scale generation of biogas, its elegant composting toilets and its excellent vegetarian casseroles.

Viscount Twaklinton supervises all security measures for the Crown Joules of Nilkawt, including the magnificent gigawatt orb and the spectacular solar sceptre, both of which he stores in a secret, former septic tank, well out of reach of all scientifically-illiterate climate, climb-it and climb-into-it skeptics. The crown itself is carefully stored in a plastic box in a salinated well, which is just as well.