Thursday, 30 October 2014

Constitutional Crisis

Many concerns have been raised recently about the lack of news from Nilkawt.  There have even been some suggestions that the Nilkawtians are currently experiencing a constitutional crisis.

This digital embassy is open, mainly because the Nilkawtian head of state, Her Illustrious Highness the Ethereal Grand Duchess, Twaklin I, is currently in exile in this vicinity.  The judicial system of Nilkawt has collapsed, quite literally.

In view of this, before leaving the royal palace in Twaklinton, Her Illustrious Highness declared a state of emergency, as is her constitutional prerogative.  All states of emergency in Nilkawt usually amount to the same thing as an ad hoc public holiday.  Most members of the Nilkawtian public are, therefore, quite pleased about the current situation.

The facts of the matter are clear.  None of the judges of the Nilkawtian Hike Kawt Court of the Caught completed the necessary course of conduct as tradition prescribes, thereby deeming them unfit for office.  This was mainly due to the fact that the judges of the court had all been too busy in recent years, reading legislative documents and government reports in order to uphold the constitution.  They had therefore been unable to schedule enough time for physical training.

It has also reached the notice of the government of Nilkawt, as well as the Nilkawtian parliament/public, that all the judges of the Hike Kawt Court of the Caught had been prescribed medications for conditions incompatible with athletic exertions.  In view of this, once recovered enough to travel, the judges were all sent off to Adelaide last Saturday for an evening presentation of judicial evidence.

The Nilkawtian head of state is in the process of setting up a government in exile here in Adelaide.  She has the keys to all the government offices and official filing cabinets of Nilkawt in her possession, as well as the keys to the voting machine, the spare keys to the royal palace and all the key documents from the Hike Kawt building itself.

There have been no signs of civil unrest in Nilkawt, except for a few tourists who are unhappy that their tours of the royal palace have been cancelled.  Throughout history, foreigners have often been considered to be far more dangerous than locals when legal systems collapse.