Monday, 12 October 2015

Chargé d'affaires ad interim

While the ambassador has been performing ceremonial duties in Nilkawt, this embassy in Adelaide has been under the supervision of the deputy ambassador, the current chargé d'affaires ad interim, Bon-Sir Doug Dada of Dada.  Bon-Sir Doug is informally known by the staff here as Bonza, Bonzer or Bonzo Doug, though they are banned from addressing him in that manner whenever there are non-Nilkawtians present.

Bon-Sir Doug was originally the King of Dadadada.  He gave up the title and the territory to the Nilkawtians as a conciliatory gesture after he was caught busking with a banjo and kazoo whilst hitchhiking through the Nilkawtian county of Elegantshire without the required permits.  He has since been banned from all areas of Nilkawt, which is why he has a job at this embassy.

Bon-Sir is the official title given by the Nilkawtians to male deputy ambassadors, past and present.  The title is honorary, like the diplomatic position itself.

In diplomatic circles, Bon-Sir Doug is known as the kissing anarchist.  He even claims he once kissed Henry Kissinger on the lips at Camp David though that is yet to be verified through Wikileaks, or by the Nobel laureate himself.

There have been rumours about Bon-Sir Doug's relationship with Mao Zedong.  It appears, however, that both gentlemen merely enjoyed a mutual interest in the work of Peter Kropotkin, though tongues may still wag.

Mr Kropotkin is now an ethereal mentor to a significant section of the American Republican Party, apparently.  This information may easily be verified through global television broadcasts in the months ahead.

Although, for reasons of hygiene, neither kissing nor anarchy are permitted within Nilkawt, nor in the grounds of Villa Twaklinilkawt, Bon-Sir Doug frequently attends the parlour meant for you dressed as an 18th century duchess.  He usually does so for the sandwiches and cakes rather than the conversations.  He is therefore usually too busy eating to kiss anyone.

Further information:

Felicitation and facilitation

A birthday celebration